Dissociation is a psychological experience that many people encounter, often without realising it. It’s a natural response to overwhelming situations and can range from mild daydreaming to a more profound disconnection from reality.
For those experiencing trauma or long-term stress, dissociation can become a recurring or even chronic condition.
What is Dissociation?
Dissociation is a mental process where an individual feels disconnected from their thoughts, feelings, memories, or sense of identity. It’s a way for the mind to cope when something becomes too difficult to bear. Think of it as your brain’s “safety switch,” a temporary escape mechanism to protect you from psychological overwhelm.
At its core, dissociation can manifest as:
- A sense of detachment from yourself or your surroundings.
- A feeling of numbness or lack of emotion.
- A mental fog or zoning out, where time feels distorted or unreal.
While dissociation is often associated with trauma, it’s important to recognise that it can also occur during periods of intense stress or emotional conflict.
What Dissociation is Not
Dissociation is not simply forgetfulness, laziness, or a lack of motivation. It’s not something someone chooses to do or can easily “snap out of.” It also isn’t a sign of weakness or failure.
It’s distinct from conditions like psychosis, which involve a break from reality rather than a detachment from it. While psychosis may include delusions or hallucinations, dissociation is more about feeling disconnected or detached without losing touch with reality.
Subtle and Obvious Symptoms of Dissociation
Subtle Symptoms:
- Losing track of time or forgetting small tasks, like where you placed your keys.
- Feeling emotionally numb, even during joyful or distressing events.
- Difficulty concentrating or feeling like your mind is “blank.”
- Experiencing a slight sense of disconnection, as though watching your life from a distance.
- Feeling like your body isn’t entirely your own (e.g., hands feel foreign or “strange”).
- Zoning out while reading, driving, or having a conversation without realising it.
Obvious Symptoms:
- Memory gaps, sometimes referred to as “dissociative amnesia,” where chunks of time are missing.
- Feeling as though the world is unreal or dreamlike (known as derealisation).
- Feeling like you’re outside of your body, observing yourself from afar (known as depersonalisation).
- Adopting multiple identities or personas is often seen in Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID).
- A sense of panic or disorientation when trying to reconnect with reality.
How Does Dissociation Start?
Dissociation often begins as a protective response to trauma, especially in childhood when the brain is still developing. If a child cannot escape a frightening or harmful situation, their brain may “disconnect” to avoid feeling the full impact of fear or pain. This can occur in response to physical, emotional, or sexual abuse, neglect, or even chronic stress in an unstable environment.
For adults, dissociation may start or worsen after a traumatic event such as an accident, loss of a loved one, or intense stress, like workplace burnout or prolonged caregiving. It can also arise from unresolved hidden traumas that the individual may not consciously remember.
Why Do Our Brains and Bodies Dissociate?
The human brain is incredibly adaptive, and dissociation is one of its survival mechanisms. During trauma or overwhelming stress, our brain perceives the situation as a threat to our survival. In such moments, the brain activates the “fight, flight, freeze, or fawn” response. Dissociation often falls into the “freeze” category.
- Neurobiology of dissociation: The amygdala, processes fear, and signals danger, while the prefrontal cortex (responsible for rational thought) shuts down. This leads to a state of disconnection to help the individual endure the experience.
- Emotional protection: Dissociation creates a buffer between you and the overwhelming emotions or sensations, effectively numbing the experience to make it survivable.
While this is helpful in the short term, repeated dissociation can leave an individual feeling detached from their emotions, relationships, and sense of self.
Situations That May Cause Dissociation
Dissociation is most commonly linked to trauma, but it can also arise from situations like:
- Ongoing abuse or toxic relationships.
- Grief or loss that feels unbearable.
- Workplace or academic stress that overwhelms emotional resources.
- Medical procedures or illnesses that feel invasive or threatening.
- Extreme fear or panic during an accident or disaster.
Even seemingly mild stressors, like relational conflict or unmet emotional needs, can trigger dissociation in those who are predisposed due to earlier trauma.
What Can Be Done About Dissociation?
1. Awareness and Self-Compassion
Recognising dissociation is the first step. Understanding that it’s a protective mechanism, not a personal flaw, can help reduce shame or guilt. Journaling about your experiences or sharing them with a trusted person can help build awareness.
2. Grounding Techniques
Grounding techniques can help bring you back to the present moment when you feel yourself dissociating:
- Physical grounding: Hold an ice cube, press your feet into the floor, or touch a textured object.
- Sensory grounding: Listen to music, smell something strong like peppermint, or focus on something visually engaging in your surroundings.
You can access some free downloads for grounding, especially useful if you are ‘triggered’ (an overwhelming response to something that creates high anxiety and, often, dissociation):
Please see the ‘Downloads’ section of the website menu or, in particular the following:
3. Working with a Jungian Psychotherapist and Healer, like me.
Jungian Psychotherapy provides a holistic and transformative approach to healing dissociation. By exploring the unconscious mind, we can uncover the roots of dissociation and integrate fragmented parts of the self. This process often involves:
- Exploring the symbolic meaning of dreams and memories to uncover hidden traumas.
- Reconnecting with the body and emotions through gentle, non-invasive practices like guided imagery.
- Developing a stronger sense of self by working with archetypes and shadow aspects, fostering a deeper understanding of who you are.
- Intuitive coaching to align with your inner wisdom and create a sense of safety and empowerment.
- Spiritual healing and Reiki, which can help release blocked energy and reconnect you to a sense of wholeness.
Healing is Possible
While dissociation can feel confusing and isolating, it’s important to remember that it’s a response to pain, not a permanent state. With compassionate support, self-awareness, and the right therapeutic tools, you can begin to heal and reconnect with yourself and the world around you.
I don’t know if I’ve ever felt so validated in my mental health journey. This is a great description of the undiagnosed “episodes” I’ve been experiencing, increasingly worse…2 car accidents…over the past couple of years. I’m going to explore this further, beginning with identifying a therapist willing to explore. Thank you!
Hello Melissa, I am very pleased that you feel this is helpful. I am not sure if you know but I am a Psychotherapist and trauma is a speciality of mine. If you would like to have a quick chat with me please feel free to give me a call on 07905 038378 or email me at linda@lindabishopp.co.uk. Kind regards, Linda.
Hi, I often get frustrated with dissociation = trauma. What I loved about your LinkedIn post (this article) was the link to chronic stress which is mostly ignored. My guess is that most of us, professionals and non professionals, don’t see chronic stress in the same way as trauma. Somehow stress is/should be manageable, i.e. it’s life, and we should learn to deal with, live with it, rise above, we are in charge of it… whereas trauma is imposed upon us, and therefore we are managing it by dissociating with event/s and its ‘not our fault’. I am psychotherapist and spent years in personal therapy attempting to deal with life’s events, hence why this resonates with me. My previous analyst would push the idea of trauma, regardless what I had to say on the matter. Needless to say, I no longer work with her! Right now, I’m at the retreat and spending time to explore the impact of chronic stress has on me. All of me. So, thank you.
Hello Kostana, I feel that acute, and also chronic stress, is at one end of the continuum leading to trauma. In other words, if there is repeated stress then it could lead to trauma. I have worked with it that way and my interventions seem to ease both over time. I do hope the retreat gives you what you need.
An interesting read. I work with a few students at school and they mention sometimes they feel they are not here, in reality! Is this what they are experiencing- dissociation?
I suggested they mentioned it in their next appointment with their mental health support team.
Hello Claire, thank you. Any form of ‘not quite here’ is dissociation though not all of it is a psychological difficulty eg daydreaming. Simple grounding techniques can be very helpful e.g. the Four Paws exercise on my website (www.lindabishopp.co.uk).
Hello Linda-
Your article has been like a light switching on to help me. I feel what you describe as dissociation on an almost daily basis. I have learned to manage somehow but your article explained a lot. I was drugged and sexually assaulted in college, married a horribly mean man and finally divorced, had a cesarean for birth of my daughter which had complications requiring ketamine to relax uterine contractions (contractions started during the surgery) and the ketamine cause a profound out-of-body experience and subsequent depression. Married another many who turned out to be completely dishonest and pulled the proverbial rug from under me. That same man had some sort of fatal event and was found deceased in a parking lot. My son is retired Marine with 100% disability due to TBI and PTSD. I have also had both knees replaced, one hip replaced and two wrist surgeries to repair fractures after a fall. I guess you could say I have chronic anxiety and stress. Lots of therapy, years of prescribed medications (no schedule meds). I work a lot of hours, am good at what I do but feel completely numb and lacking of emotions most of the time. I feel most “normal” when I am with my sister and with my son. The descriptions in your article were as though you were describing my life. I am thinking I can explore this more and maybe learn to feel and “be” in my daily life. Thank you so much for your article.